小明在家里是一个很受宠的孩子。从小明很小的时候,妈妈就给小明安排了独立的卧室。但是小明还小,他也很怕黑,家长也非常理解,所以妈妈总是在小明入睡前陪小明在卧室,给小明讲睡前故事。

Xiao Ming is a very popular child at home. When Xiao Ming was very young, his mother arranged a separate bedroom for Xiao Ming. But Xiao Ming is still small, he is also very afraid of the dark, parents also understand very well, so mother always in Xiao Ming sleep with Xiao Ming in the bedroom, tell Xiao Ming a bedtime story.

久而久之,小明也就养成了睡前听故事的这种习惯。但是当小明长大以后还是会缠着妈妈听故事。直到小明13岁的时候还是会要求妈妈每天给小明讲睡前故事。

Over time, Xiaoming also formed the habit of listening to stories before bedtime. But when Xiaoming grows up, he still pesters his mother to listen to the story. Until Xiaoming 13 years old will still ask his mother to tell Xiaoming bedtime story every day.

家里人本来想的是孩子小时候害怕,所以说可以多陪陪孩子,给孩子讲睡前故事。但是孩子长大以后家长就慢慢的不这么想了。

The family originally thought is the child childhood fear, therefore may accompany the child more, tells the child the bedtime story. But when the child grows up, the parents slowly don't think so.

他们觉得这时候再给孩子讲故事就会助长孩子的不良习惯,所以在孩子13岁的时候不顾孩子的反对毅然决然的结束了给孩子讲故事,但是孩子哪能一下受得了这个呀。

They feel that telling stories to their children at this time will help their children's bad habits, so at the age of 13, regardless of the child's opposition resolutely ended to tell the story to the child, but the child cannot bear this.

孩子就每天缠着爸爸妈妈,每天哭闹,这时候家长才意识到自己的睡前小故事。给孩子带来了多么严重的后果。所以有时候我们需要退出孩子的一些关键期。

Every day the child haunts his parents and cries every day, when the parents realize their little bedtime story. What serious consequences for the child. So sometimes we need to quit some of our kids'critical periods.

故事中的小明就是因为家长没有及时退出孩子的卧室。从而让孩子养成不良的习惯。孩子小时候还小,我们都可以理解,但是当孩子五岁的时候就应该培养孩子独自睡觉的习惯。

Xiao Ming in the story is because the parents did not withdraw from the child's bedroom in time. so that children develop bad habits. When a child is young, we can all understand, but when a child is five, he should cultivate the habit of sleeping alone.

怕黑家长可以理解,可以陪孩子一段时间,但是等孩子适应了以后家长就要立刻离开,因为我们要让孩子做一个勇敢的孩子。可以带孩子去一些科技馆之类的地方,帮助孩子了解一下为什么关灯了,就会变黑,为什么睡觉的时候要关灯?这样孩子就很容易理解,也就很容易接受一个人睡觉了。

Afraid of black parents can understand, can accompany the child for a while, but when the child adapts, the parent must leave immediately, because we want the child to be a brave child. Can take the child to some science and technology museum and so on, help the child to understand why turn off the light, will become dark, why to turn off the light when sleeping? So that the child is easy to understand, and it is easy to accept a person to sleep.

当孩子上小学以后就会有一些自己的小秘密,会有一些自己的小玩具,孩子会摆放在自己的房间,这时候家长就要学会尊重孩子,每个人都需要被尊重,孩子也不例外,我们不可以对孩子的每一件物品都刨根问底。

When children go to primary school there will be some of their own little secrets, there will be some of their own little toys, children will be placed in their own room, this time parents will learn to respect their children, everyone needs to be respected, children are no exception, we cannot ask every child's everything.

孩子有自己的私人空间,孩子会感觉自己被尊重,自己在家里也是一个独立的个体。孩子也会养成尊重别人的好习惯。

Children have their own private space, children will feel that they are respected, and they are an independent individual at home. Children will also develop the good habit of respecting others.

孩子十五岁已经不小了可以独自收拾家务,不用我们家长担心。可能有些家长还是会担心,觉得自己家孩子从来没有独自收拾过家务。但是我们要理解一下,孩子也在慢慢的长大,我们谁不是从孩子的时候过来的呢?我们也要自己收拾家务,那么孩子以后也要自己收拾家务。如果遇到我们不在家的时候孩子把家里弄得乱七八糟的怎么办?

Children 15 years old can be alone to clean up the housework, do not worry about our parents. Some parents may still be worried that their children have never cleaned up their own household chores. But we have to understand that the children are also slowly growing up, which of us did not come from the childhood? We also have to clean up the housework ourselves, then the children also have to clean up the housework themselves later. What if the kids mess up the house when we're not at home?

所以我们要让孩子独自收拾家务,我们不要干预。我们相信每一个孩子都会自己收拾家务,每一个孩子都是很优秀的孩子。

So we have to let the children clean up the housework alone, and we don't interfere. We believe that every child will clean up their own housework, every child is a very good child.

当孩子18岁的时候可能会面临高考填志愿。这时候家长就要退出孩子的个人选择。因为孩子不管做了什么选择,都是他自己的事情,如果我们干预的话,孩子以后觉得自己的学校不好,可能还会怨恨家长,可能会和家长产生隔阂。

When the child is 18, he may face a voluntary college entrance examination. Parents are then leaving their children's personal choices. Because no matter what choice the child made, it is his own thing, if we intervene, the child later feel that his school is not good, may also resent the parents, may be estranged from the parents.

所以说我们要退出孩子的个人选择,这样不仅是尊重孩子,也是让孩子知道他长大了,他可以有自己的选择,父母可以尊重他的选择,父母不干预孩子的选择,孩子会有成人意识,会有自我意识,会自己独立去做一些大人的事情。

So we want to withdraw from the child's personal choice, this is not only to respect the child, but also to let the child know that he has grown up, he can have his own choice, parents can respect his choice, parents do not interfere with the child's choice, the child will have adult consciousness, will have self-consciousness, will do some adult things on their own.

这些你都记好了吗?一定要在孩子适当的时候退出孩子的这些关键期,因为孩子在慢慢的长大,我们也不可能一直陪伴孩子,我们也要让孩子独自去处理一些事物,相信在我们的放手之下,孩子也可以做得更好,甚至比之前还要好。

Do you remember all this? Be sure to quit these critical periods when the child is in due course, because the child is growing up slowly, we cannot always accompany the child, we also have to let the child handle some things alone, believe that under our letting go, the child can also do better, even better than before.


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